J O N A T H A N A M E S
|Where are you located?
How far will you roam for literary-related fun and excitement?
What are you working on?
Paying the rent. Not doing too well.
What's your font?
What font turns you on?
Pay to the order of Jonathan Ames
Which do you enjoy more: having sex or reading about people having sex?
What do you like to read aloud to the person lying post-coitally beside you?
Nothing really, usually fall asleep or cuddle.
Is the proverbial stack of books beside your bed actually stacked there for that precise purpose?
Yes, hope to read, or glanced at and then placed there, too lazy to reshelve until the stack gets completely unwieldy.
If you could take to bed any author, who would that author be?
There are a lot of sexy women writers . . . can't think of just one.
If you could take to bed any fictional character, which character would that be?
Just about any of the women in Raymond Chandler's books
If you could sexually satisfy yourself with a book, which book would that be?
I used to sexually satisfy myself, as an adolescent, with Psychopathia Sexualis, an early literary and psychiatric influence.
Which author (besides yourself) do you most resemble, physically, emotionally, psychologically?
Not an author but someone showed me a portrait of Matisse and I sort of look like him -- same balding pattern, and from certain angles I've been told I look like Van Gogh, who's mostly known for his paintings, as is Matisse, but he also, famously, wrote many letters, primarily to his brother, often asking for money, so I identify with that, except I don't have a brother I can go to for money. Don't really have anybody, though my parents used to help me out a lot.
Do you refuse to see the movie until you've read the book?
Do you still remember the page number you folded over in Judy Blume's "Forever?"
Never read it.
Please submit both a good-sex sex scene and a bad-sex sex scene of your own composition. Please indicate which is which.
Bad: I put it inside her and was so excited I came right away.
Good: I put it insider her, was able to control myself, and she had several lovely orgasms.
Do signed first editions arouse you inexplicably?
Does "submitting" to literary journals/websites have its sexual side?
There is the humiliating aspect -- rejection, like sexual rejection.
What books have you read while entertaining the near-constant thought "Would I sleep with this writer?"
No such book comes to mind.
Do you wait for your partner to get up to use the bathroom before you write down the things he/she said to you while having sex or do you whip out the notebook while he/she is still panting in the bed beside you?
Neither; have never written down any post-sex remarks, oddly enough. Don't like to kiss and tell, except really weird stories, not normal love-making stories.
Or do you each keep a tape recorder beside the bed for just such a purpose?
To contract Jonathan Ames, send an introductory e-mail to firstname.lastname@example.org. We recommend you buy his latest book, My Less Than Secret Life, and attend his readings, where he tends to make "a sound." He has a website too.
WE WILL OFFER WOMEN ONE DAY
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